Last night I took part in a conversation about how short life is when you think about it and for a change it had nothing to do with someone passing away or some ones health issues.
It seems like just a few years ago I was running the streets being a normal teenager rebelling against my parents. Looking back, I did give my parents many causes for concern and upset, but not near as many as my siblings did. I attended my fair share of unsupervised parties, telling my parents I was sleeping over at a friend’s house when in fact we all spent a few nights at places that we should never have been. I experimented with drugs only once and did not have a good experience with it making it the last time. I could use the age old excuse “I grew up in an abusive home” which in fact I did, but since I’m a bit more mature now, that excuse doesn’t seem to fit now. I was asked if I regretted anything I did in my youth and in all honesty there is nothing I regret, since my past behaviour has made me who I am today. That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t change certain things in my life, it just means that all I did in my youth became a learning experience. If I could turn back time, there are a few things I might have done differently, but, if I was able to change things I would not have what I do today and I’m not talking about material things either.
I have tried hard to change my outlook on my own life and not just life in general and I think in some small ways I have succeeded. I never went by the self help books because in my own opinion they are filled with the proverbial bull crap and if I am able to face myself in the mirror then I’m doing ok. Am I following the rules of life? Definitely not, but it is working for me. I’m not saying I’m where I want to be in life, I’m just saying that where I am now is helping me become who I’m suppose to be when I finally grow up.